"Never try and appease a bully, it just doesn't work."
This letter was written by my great-grandfather, Lieutenant Geoffrey Oliver, 57th Heavy Anti-Aircraft Regiment, Royal Artillery on 1st February 1945.
He was a Lieutenant in the Royal Artillery. He was evacuated from Dunkirk in May 1940 and towards the end of the war took part of the Italy campaign.
The letter was sent while he was in Italy in 1945 to his one year old son Guy (my grandad) on his first birthday. When the letter was sent they hadn’t met because my great-grandfather was away fighting in the war.
My grandad is 81 now.
Transcript:
Lieutenant Geoffrey Oliver, 57th Heavy Anti-Aircraft Regiment, The Royal Artillery
1st February 1945
My dear Guy,
This letter is written for a very special occasion – your first birthday. When you received it, your father had never yet seen you because you were born while he was away in Italy fighting in the war you have heard and read so much about. Your mother had to carry on during that time before and after you came into this world, with all the worry and responsibility attached to bringing up a baby and at the same time managing a home and the money, things which in the ordinary way we should have shared together. I think you will find that your mother and father share practically everything they have with each other. I am not going to talk about what I did in the war, it is sufficient to say I at was in the Eighth Army and leave it at that. What I am going to say is why I was away when you had your first birthday. You see Guy, you will read about this war, and that which your father can remember, as history and history might not say quite what we knew at the time. I think it can be summed up in one phrase “Peace and quietness at any price”.
Between the wars we had as a nation, grown prosperous and overcontented, and with that we grew lazy. It was too much trouble to do a great deal more than enjoy ourselves. When there was an election we couldn’t be bothered to vote – we did not take much interest in government and things like that. Consquently the wrong people got into power and we just sat & let them be so long as they didn't interfere with us & the things we liked. But there were two governments to other countries who were aggressive & kept demanding things from small nations it wasn't in our power to give; we couldn't give away other peoples things but that is just what we did to, to our shame. When we woke up at last, to our sense of shame, we had to go to war to stop further demands. Also we then knew we should have been next on the list & then perhaps you might not have been born, or if you had you wouldn't have been able to call yourself an Englishman, because Englishman wouldn't have been allowed any longer.
I am telling you all this because I want you to know two things.
First never try and appease a bully, it just doesn’t work. If anyone bullies you stand up to him and give as good as he does or better. You will find he will leave you alone in future. Of course with that, never bully anyone yourself.
Secondly if ever you find yourself getting slack, or your country, try and do something about it. A few earnest souls can do quite a lot, as you will find out when you read the history of this war and the Battle of Britain. I am quite sure if we had stopped our government from doing what we knew in our hearts was wrong & shameful I should have spent your first birthday with you. But it might have been uncomfortable if we had, so we didn't & had to endure years of discomfort, hardship, the death of thousands in consequence.
It will be hard to realise quite what your mother suffered during that time, the worry and anxiety, the constant separation. All I can say is you have the best mother in the world, you will never know quite how good she is because in her finest hour when she carried on alone you were young and helpless and couldn’t know. My mother did the same under similar circumstances when your grandfather was away at war but I was old enough to remember and can now appreciate what she did. Your mother and I have found that love and truth and honesty with each other are the only real things that matter. You will be taught that and hear others sneer and scoff at them. Don’t believe the scoffers Guy because they are wrong, and you will never find such people happy, as we are.
Good luck and all my love, Dad
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